How to Be a Good Friend

People thrive on interactions with others

Meta Description: Strong friendships can bring meaning to your life. Learn how to be a better friend with five tips for listening, supporting, and connecting.

Humans thrive on interactions with others, with relationships of all types helping to bring meaning to life. Friendships, in particular, help you connect with like-minded individuals and flesh out your sense of self.

The key to forging friendships lies not only in who you choose to surround yourself with, but also in making an effort to be a good friend yourself. Not only will this help you to hold onto your friendships, bringing more good memories to your days, but it can also help you focus on the values that you find important and shift your locus of control over your relationships to yourself.

5 Ways to Be a Good Friend

Sometimes, we need to make a conscious effort to be a good friend. The following are five things to keep in mind when it comes to your friendships.

Be A Good Listener

Friendship is meant to be a two-way street, meaning it’s crucial that you don’t use your friend as a sounding board for all your problems but then never give them a chance to discuss their day, as well. People rely on the opportunity to discuss their challenges with their peers so that they can receive insight or guidance on how to approach the problem from a different angle. In order to offer that to your friends, though, you need to be a good listener.

If you find yourself spending most of your time with your friends talking, or don’t really listen when they talk, make an effort to shift your focus so that you can be a better friend.

Lift Others Up, Rather Than Being Critical

While offering guidance, when it’s asked for, can be a helpful aspect of friendship, the key component of friendship is to lift each other up. You shouldn’t feel jealousy toward a friend or be critical of their actions; if you are, you may find your friends pulling away from you.

Practice Empathy

To be a good friend, practice empathy, or the ability to imagine yourself in someone else’s shoes. When your friend is describing a problem, try to imagine how they must be feeling in this situation—doing so will allow you to offer guidance and support in a better way.

Acknowledge That Disagreement Is OK

In order to be a good friend, you must acknowledge that disagreement is OK. You and your friends don’t need to share the same opinions on everything; the key is to respect each other, even when you disagree on the best movie genre or the best way to parent your children.

Friendships do not only exist between two people who are exactly alike—in fact, expecting this is a sure way to find disappointment. Instead, find common ground with your friends, but also be alright with having areas where you differ. In the end, these differences can help bring a new perspective to your life.

Recognize The Different Levels Of Friendship

Not all friendships are the same. Some people are only work friends, while others are childhood friends, and others may be the friends that you turn to in any scenario. All of these friendships are still valuable, though, and being a good friend involves recognizing the different types of friendship and where each fits into your life.

Learning to Be a Good Friend

Making a conscious effort to be a good friend is a great first step in creating strong relationships. For more guidance, Kathy Morelli, LPC, is currently accepting new clients and only practices using the HIPAA-compliant app called Doxy.me. Kathy accepts most insurance plans.

Please contact Kathy via her Psychology Today profile.